Last week, I went to interview a preacher. He came three hours late to his church venue of our meeting and I was a bit angry, but when he explained what kept him, not only did I forgive him quickly and learnt some lessons, I also decided to share thiis with anyone itching to do the same too.
Its pertinent for husbands and wives to imbibe the art of settling quarrels without delay.
I have witnessed situations where couples allow simple disagreement to fester for days. The husband is silently hurting, expecting his wife to speak to him first. Same for the wife, hurting and expecting her husband to play the man. The waiting game leads from one thing to another. If you are at this level in your matrimony, you might have to call your spouse, and together take an oath that your quarrels will not last beyond that moment.
I have witnessed situations where couples allow simple disagreement to fester for days. The husband is silently hurting, expecting his wife to speak to him first. Same for the wife, hurting and expecting her husband to play the man. The waiting game leads from one thing to another. If you are at this level in your matrimony, you might have to call your spouse, and together take an oath that your quarrels will not last beyond that moment.
The husband and wife, who happen to be the reverend's church members, had a domestic disagreement one morning. The man was so bitter about it, claiming his wife knew she was wrong but refused to apologize. His wife, on her part, felt it was a non-issue, and expected her husband to overlook it easily. Three simple words; 'I am sorry', became a difficulty. I guess many a wife still take their husbands for granted way too much. We are humans. Blood flow in our veins. Make una hear well well!.
Three days on, and malice still reigns in the house. The husband, determined to get his apology at all cost, started ignoring his wife's meals, coming home with Tantalizer packs every evening. Boycotting their matrimonial bed, he finds new friends in the children. This goes on with his wife also, but the children are way too young to break the ice. I've been there before. Thank God I am wiser now.
Last Sunday, they both went to church in their separate vehicles, but sat side by side during service, pretending to be jolly good friends. Fraud in the house of God! Jibiti ponbele! Lord have mercy. After service, her husband went home with the children while she waited for women's meeting. I guess Lucifer couldn't wait no more. Crevice found, clear shot; its time to take it.
Husband now home, and perfunctorily checked his phone; his wife had called him thrice. He disregarded it and refused returning her calls. Malice! She drove in some forty minutes later. He saw Usman open the gate for her as his phone kept ringing. He checked it. Its her. She had parked her car in the garage already. What on earth is she calling me for! Foolish and stubborn wife! he muttered. Ignoring her consistent calls, he sat to watch TV.
Thirty minutes later, she had not come in. 'Is she still in the car?' Something told him to go check. Now scared, he calls Usman; Is madam in the car? Few minutes later, the gate man rushed in; Madam dey sleep inside car o! That was when he came to his senses and rushed downstairs. Asthma! 'Could she be having her usual attack?', 'Could she have forgotten her inhaler?'. He grabs the hand-held portable device and rush downstairs. Getting there to find her almost breathless. Toppling her into the rear seat of the car, he rushed her to a nearby hospital, speeding off like a deer escaping the jaws of an hungry lion. Too late! Madam was confirmed dead on arrival! If only he had picked her call early enough, maybe her life could have been salvaged.
When you leave domestic disagreement to fester for too long, it leads to greater evil, the preacher said. The husband couldn't help but blame himself for her death. Only God knows how many wives, husbands and children have died such needless death. Couples must learn to cultivate each other.
No matter how angry I am with my wife; I, in my office; she, in her shop, I find time to call her at least three times during the day. I call even when I have no reason to. All I say most time is; where are you?, wetin dey?, anything for your boyfriend?. I do not say this to impress anybody, I say it because its true.
Culled from 'Thoughts From the Diary of my Heart' by Ewoma Luther-Abegunde
Photo Credit: smallworship.com
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